Month: April 2020

Don’t Blame Trump: If You Took Medical Advice From Him, You’re An Idiot

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At Thursday’s Coronavirus briefing, after a few words from one of the scientists who are studying what to do and how to do it in terms of dealing with COVID-19, President Trump stood up and queried about different methods that could possibly be used to kill the virus.

One of the things he mentioned was the injection or ingestion of disinfectants.

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Of course, the media jumped all over this. The head of the CDC issued a statement to never ever ever inject or ingest disinfectants. Even Lysol made it clear that using their products internally would cause grave danger and cleaning products should be used as directed on the bottle.

Friday, 24 hours after Trump’s comments, the public was still being warned against things like drinking bleach and pumping Lysol in their veins.

Today, Saturday, now about 48 hours later, the messaging continues.

Before I put on my trusty surgical mask and ran to Dollar General, I came across this article letting the world know that within 24 hours of Trump’s statement, 30 New Yorkers called into poison control centers to inquire about drinking bleach and doing other ridiculous things with household cleaners in order to kill COVID-19.

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Whew! There’s the synopsis.

Of course, everyone is either laughing or mad at Trump. I’ve seen several people declare that Trump is going to get us all killed. I mean…I can’t call it.

What I do know though is that Trump is getting too much credit for the stupidity of the American populace.

Let’s be clear: anyone who would even consider drinking bleach to cure a virus is a dumb muthafucker and it wouldn’t have mattered if Trump, Obama, the Wizard of Oz, or Dr. Ruth told them to do it.

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What’s next? Are we going to start taking 4 year-olds up on their advice that we have cake and ice cream for breakfast every day? Maybe we’ll make smoking cigarettes cool again as an effective way to keep our waistline in check? Perhaps we should start eating a Snicker’s, a bag of seasoned fries, and a 20oz. Coke for lunch like we did when were 16 as an anti-aging tactic!

That’s how these people sound taking medical advice from a non-medical professional president. Better yet, they’re taking medical advice from a person who has gotten caught in so many lies since he’s been in office that Webster will probably come up with a new word for lie once his presidency is over.

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The upshot is this: Trump can be blamed for many many many things. But you can’t blame him for the lack of grey matter in other people’s brains – or yours (if it applies).

What I hate the most is that the idiot cohort of this country has made me officially and in writing defend Donald Trump.

 

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Biden Is The Nominee, Geico Sucks & I Didn’t Get A Stimulus Check

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First, let me apologize for the completely uncreative title. I know I’m usually better than that where titles are concerned but in the last two weeks, everything and everyone has been rather disappointing so I figured I’d throw myself onto that heap.

With that said, Biden is the “presumptive” Democratic nominee (unless one of the Avengers comes out of nowhere the night of the convention, shoots him with a laser that makes him forget he was running, and Bernie takes center stage). I was never a hardcore Bernie-ite. I didn’t engage in any e-fights with anyone about the merits of Bernie’s candidacy or the validity of his plans once in office. However, if COVID-19 has taught us anything, it’s that Bernie was prolly right about that Medicare For All thing.

I see Biden as a relic. I think Biden’s time was after Obama left office and he missed his shot. Biden reminds me of every Boomer who has talked down to Millennials about the student loan crisis, bleak employment prospects, and stagnant wages. The biggest issue is that he can’t beat Trump.

Honestly, I feel like we can go ahead and vote tomorrow. I doubt the outcome will be any different in November.

Geico, who I’ve been with for years, decided that once you renew, they’ll give you 15% off. That’s after their COMPETITORS announced that they were giving money back to their policyholders since people aren’t really driving. So basically, if you’re in the middle of your 6 month term or have already paid in full, you may have to wait several months for this “gift.”

I’m giving them until Wednesday to reverse course before I switch insurance companies. I have not the time to wait on people to act like they have some home-training.

Lastly, I didn’t get a stimulus check. I’m not surprised. I still haven’t filed my 2019 taxes and I actually had to pay those mofos in 2018. But, I hear I’m not alone. I’m not really sure how an entity that doesn’t answer its phones on a normal day didn’t have time to streamline and make the process of issuing payments more efficient during the time of COVID-19 when most people are twirling their thumbs anyway, but, as my theatre teacher used to say, such is life.

Add them to the other two entities who owe me money but have not paid.

Oh yeah! Here’s the obligatory gif:

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