Biden Is The Nominee, Geico Sucks & I Didn’t Get A Stimulus Check

First, let me apologize for the completely uncreative title. I know I’m usually better than that where titles are concerned but in the last two weeks, everything and everyone has been rather disappointing so I figured I’d throw myself onto that heap.

With that said, Biden is the “presumptive” Democratic nominee (unless one of the Avengers comes out of nowhere the night of the convention, shoots him with a laser that makes him forget he was running, and Bernie takes center stage). I was never a hardcore Bernie-ite. I didn’t engage in any e-fights with anyone about the merits of Bernie’s candidacy or the validity of his plans once in office. However, if COVID-19 has taught us anything, it’s that Bernie was prolly right about that Medicare For All thing.

I see Biden as a relic. I think Biden’s time was after Obama left office and he missed his shot. Biden reminds me of every Boomer who has talked down to Millennials about the student loan crisis, bleak employment prospects, and stagnant wages. The biggest issue is that he can’t beat Trump.

Honestly, I feel like we can go ahead and vote tomorrow. I doubt the outcome will be any different in November.

Geico, who I’ve been with for years, decided that once you renew, they’ll give you 15% off. That’s after their COMPETITORS announced that they were giving money back to their policyholders since people aren’t really driving. So basically, if you’re in the middle of your 6 month term or have already paid in full, you may have to wait several months for this “gift.”

I’m giving them until Wednesday to reverse course before I switch insurance companies. I have not the time to wait on people to act like they have some home-training.

Lastly, I didn’t get a stimulus check. I’m not surprised. I still haven’t filed my 2019 taxes and I actually had to pay those mofos in 2018. But, I hear I’m not alone. I’m not really sure how an entity that doesn’t answer its phones on a normal day didn’t have time to streamline and make the process of issuing payments more efficient during the time of COVID-19 when most people are twirling their thumbs anyway, but, as my theatre teacher used to say, such is life.

Add them to the other two entities who owe me money but have not paid.

Oh yeah! Here’s the obligatory gif:

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Pete and Amy Are Going Home…Where They Should Have Stayed In The First Place

Note: I legit thought about my title speaking for itself and not writing anything else. No lie.

Last night, white people’s favorite mayor and the person white Liberals claimed would lead us in a new direction, Pete Buttigieg finally ended his bid for the Democratic nomination.

About an hour ago, Amy Klobuchar ended her bid as well and according to The New York Times, plans to endorse Biden (of course).

All I can say is…thank goodness!

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First of all, don’t get it twisted. I am well aware of the fact that this is the same old DNC bullshit that went on in 2016. The same bullshit that has people like me not feeling any of this shit right now. I am so unenthused that I forgot that tomorrow is Super Tuesday and I never forget election dates.

But, I am glad that Buttigieg and Klobuchar are finally going home. I wish they’d never have shown up in the first place, to be quite honest. You can read more on why here and here and here.

I used to be a Democrat. I used to be a voter who would just choose the Democratic candidate in all races. I felt like the Republicans were largely unabashed racists and sexists and needed to be stopped at all costs.

That has changed.

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Part of what changed it was randos like Buttigieg and Klobuchar coming out of nowhere and having the audacity to pretend like they were presidential material. Pete Buttigieg, to me, was every smug white boy who whited his way into everything good that has ever happened to him. Amy Klobuchar was every white woman who makes excuses for her husband using “the n-word” and claims she wants to help women but all the women she helps are white (but she’s not racist because her kid’s one Black friend with matted locs spends the night aaaaall the time).

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And there’s a part of me that is pissed because Kamala Harris, who I felt had way more business being in the field, dropped out of the race while Amy sat there using other people’s oxygen knowing good and gatdamned well she had neither the capability nor the intention of seeing this all the way through; let alone winning.

While I do feel that anyone who meets the criteria to be president should be able to run, the Democrats made a mess of things this time around and I think they truly hurt their credibility. If the DNC can engage in the kind of fuckery that they did in 2016 and now (I mean…it’s obvious), then the DNC can throw its weight around and not allow this catch-all primary thing to happen again.

On that note, bye Pete and Amy! Hope to never hear from you again!!!

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Flea Market Pt. 3: Which Democrat Will Make It?

This morning, I awoke to the news that Corey Booker has decided to end his (ill-fated) campaign for the 2020 Democratic nomination. I honestly wasn’t surprised because if any of you have been keeping up, his numbers were dismal. His hopefulness was…encouraging though. Back in December, when asked on either CNN or MSNBC (can’t remember which), why he was staying in when his numbers were so low, he reminded me of a teenager resolutely expressing her plans to marry her boyfriend who had been in and out of juvie 6 times and was prone to disappear for 72-hour chunks of time.

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Anywho, Booker must have had his electoral Demascus Road experience sometime over the weekend and decided that his campaign was indeed a no-go.

So where do we stand? If you read my Flea Market Pt. 1 and Flea Market Pt. 2 posts, you’ll know we started with a mess that became a bigger mess and slowly, but surely, the mess is being cleaned up (if it could ever be).

Big hitters Joe Biden, Elizabeth Warren, and Bernie Sanders are still in the race (duh). Notorious white man who doesn’t get it but thinks being gay means otherwise Pete Buttigieg is still in it. Then, you have Amy Klobuchar holding on like a woman at a 48-hour Pentacostal revival on her knees with a prayer cloth waiting for Jesus to zap the diabetes out of her. Tulsi Gabbard is somewhere still in there even though Dems were quite nonplussed by her “Present” declaration at the impeachment vote. Andrew Yang is surprisingly doing well and still in the race. Latecoming billionaires Michael Bloomberg and Tom Steyer are also running to the extent that I can’t watch Hulu or my trash TV on TLC without seeing a commercial for one or both of them.

I haven’t decided who I’m voting for (or if I’m voting but we’ll talk about that later). But, here’s my take on each of the remaining candidates:

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Joe Biden: Frankly, I think Biden missed his shot. I think there are certain grand things in life where timing is everything. I think Biden would have easily slid into the POTUS chair had he run in 2016. He didn’t use that opportunity though and I think that door has closed. Boomers and Blacks love him but with a new crop of younger voters coming in and ideas such as Medicare for all, reparations, and student loan forgiveness seriously on the table, unless Biden does an abrupt about face, I don’t see it for him. Plus, his history in politics will ALWAYS follow him. Here’s his platform.

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Elizabeth Warren: I’m willing to forgive her for pretending to be Native American. I mean…she wouldn’t be white if she didn’t. A lot of people like her Medicare for all idea. I think it’s a good idea, too. I mean, dying or having to go bankrupt because you need a surgery or expensive medication is ridiculous in a developed country. I also like that she wants to address the maternal mortality rate for Black women that is largely driven by racism in the medical industry. What I think is an issue is that her student loan forgiveness plan doesn’t go far enough. $50k is a pretty penny but from what I’ve gathered is on the low end of what A WHOLE LOT of borrowers owe. However, visit her campaign “Plans” page here to get a peek of everything she wants to do.

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Bernie Sanders: If I had to vote today, he’d likely be my choice. I was reading his platform page and in addition to the forgiveness of all student loan debt, he also wants to forgive medical debt and replace for-profit credit bureaus. I’m still mad at Equifax for promising us $125 for their fuckup and then figuring out they couldn’t pay their bill and deciding to not pay us (oh the irony) so putting them out of business sounds great to me. Several Black people have expressed concerns about certain comments that Sanders have made that sound less than progressive. I, however, never expect to get anything racially progressive from white people; especially not a white man his age. I still think that he’s the best choice of the field at this point. Let’s just hope the DNC doesn’t….nevermind. Here’s his platform page.

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Pete Buttigieg: No.

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Andrew Yang: His page has a plethora of things that he either wants to do or “explore.” For example, one of his big three issues is “human-centered capitalism” which aims to put people before money (ie. instead of the health of the economy being measured by the stock market, it would be measured by how well people are actually doing). But, perhaps, his biggest claim to fame is his desire to give each American (over 18) “universal basic income.” This entails each American getting $1,000/mo free and clear. In theory, this extra $1,000 would allow people to have a little more breathing room each month. Every single person I know who supports Yang cites this $1,000/mo as their reason. Do I think he’ll win? Neaux. But, he may be forcing the eventual winner to step up their game a little. You can find the rest of his platform here.

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Amy Klobuchar: I Googled her website to see her platform. My only option was to sign up as a supporter or visit her store. So…..moving on….

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Tulsi Gabbard: Let me just start out by saying that I don’t think she’s serious. It’s like when you do an internship in a field you’re not really passionate about just to be able to put it on your resume in case you need it one day.  I looked at her website and she  seems to care a lot about war and war-adjacent topics (makes sense since she’s a veteran). What got me was the following line under her healthcare section:

“I will also incentivize good health choices and lifestyles for a healthier, wealthier nation!”

Whew, girl! Have you met 2016, yet? That’s the perfect steak for the people ready to accuse someone of -shaming to latch onto but you know…

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Michael Bloomberg: Yes, I know MB is the source of “Stop and Frisk.” But, Judge Judy is endorsing him so he must be alright, no? I’m just kidding. I have looked at his page though and I’ll have to admit that a Jewish candidate addressing redlining and other past racial injustices is interesting. He’s also addressing Black maternal mortality rates as well. Many people have wondered why he entered so late and suspect him of trying to buy the election. I don’t think that’s the case. Frankly, I feel like the fun part of elections is people who likely won’t win to make issues big enough so that the people who might win are under pressure to take those issues seriously. Click here for more.

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Tom Steyer: All I know is the company that he founded and worked for only has like 3 non-white people on their site and I can’t imagine it was much better when he was there so….

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The cynical conspiracy theorist in me feels like Biden has already been chosen. I don’t know that for a fact but there’s a reason Trump presumed he’d be his political rival.

Anyway, I still think Trump is going to win in 2020.